Critic's Grade: C-

Frank's film tip: You'll be wading in some uncreative shallow waters with the transparent deep sea drama INTO THE BLUE

Director John Stockwell expected moviegoers to enthusiastically don bathing suits and experience a taste of teen angst in the 2002 summertime chick flick surfing saga Blue Crush. Well, Stockwell revisits the crashing waves once again with the beautifully shot but banal bikini-clad action/adventure Into the Blue. Although both films feature the eye candy of polished young people showcasing their stuff within the scenic watery confines of the big blue ocean, Stockwell predictably helms a meager shark-infested morality tale that mirrors the familiar themes echoed by the vastly superior 1977 flick The Deep.

Much like the aforementioned Blue Crush, Into the Blue takes place in an insanely exquisite setting where the tame intrigue abounds with all the notable impact of a water-logged seashell. Stockwell's soggy seashore session manages to cram in every clich?d convention regarding youthful romance, treasure hunting, drug smuggling and carnivorous creatures while allowing the excitable chips to casually fall where they may. However, this contrived sand-trap epic fails to offer anything imaginative despite its breathtaking surroundings and buff-bodied cast. As clunky as a 300-pound rusty anchor, Into the Blue merely sinks aimlessly into the deep-watered depths of its Caribbean currents.

Blue is set in the idyllic Bahamas where late twentysomething Jared (The Fast and the Furious's Paul Walker) is a studly beach bum lounging around at will. Life doesn't seem too unfair for Jared since he resides on a terrific property and has an indescribable gorgeous-looking gal (Jessica Alba, Sin City) to cozy up to without hesitation. However, Jared holds the belief that a recent hurricane may have conveniently exposed some pirate loot--perhaps also wondering if a sunken ship figures into the mix. Whatever the case may be, Jared and his desirous girlfriend must try and locate the tremendous treasures in the sea-bottom trenches. On board to help out with this watering hole expedition is Jared's irksome visiting buddy (Scott Caan) and his kissing partner (Ashley Scott).

While underwater, Jared and his crew do uncover some interesting substances--namely the incredible amount of packaged cocaine from the cargo of a doomed plane that was forced to crash. The dilemma of finding these loads of drugs presents a major problem. Should Jared and gang report the illegal tons of stash to the proper authorities while realizing that this might jeopardize their bid for a fabulous fortune? Besides, the bad timing just is not right especially when the quartet miraculously discovers a pirate ship that may hold the key to some unknown riches. What will our roguish sea-divers do to refrain from mentioning their unique discoveries without risking their necks from both the good and bad guys that they stumble upon? Will Jared and his hangers-on be automatic fish bait for the hungry sharks or be reserved for the shady human predators that want to devour them but for different reasons altogether?

Into the Blue wants to incorporate a hip contemporary aquatic thriller that meshes together all sorts of stylish moods and inferences in an attempt to sell its suggestive yet simplistic story. Undoubtedly, there's a calming aura about watching the impeccable fleshy frames of the picture perfect stars wiggling effortlessly through the intoxicating water. However, the suspense feels rather synthetic and one cannot help but to realize how grasping this whole proceeding is in its pseudo-exuberance.

Armed with an arbitrary soundtrack of reactionary pop tunes meant to compliment the lush photography of the movie's eye-catching sheen, Blue struggles to present anything compelling beyond the hormonal instincts of appreciating the shapely and delicious derriere of the curvaceous Alba. Not surprisingly, this is one of the few legitimate guilty pleasures allotted for this sluggish scuba-diving chiller.

Both Walker and Alba may be considered ideally fetching for the adoring masses but they contribute less to the anemic plot as their so-called sizzling union has all the convincing tightness and security of a baggy pair of boxer shorts. Stiff acting, strained excitement, conventional cardboard villains, pathetic and annoyingly over-the-top sidekicks (yes, that means you Caan)--all are laughable and labored in Stockwell's numbingly nautical narrative.

Suffice to say that Into the Blue is a tepid treasure chest that one wouldn't mind burying for someone else to find.

Frank rates this film: ** stars (out of 4 stars)

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